One Year Ago Today

One year ago today I made the move to Olive Branch to start a huge new phase of my life.  I had worked hard to finish my Master's and searched to find the right job for me, and I found it here in DeSoto County.  The past 365 days have been full of ups and downs, triumphs and tribulations, encouragements and obstacles, but I truly wouldn't trade them for anything.  I have changed as a person over these past twelve months, and I am not the same girl who stood unpacking box after box (after box after box... y'all know I have waaaaay to much stuff for my own good) in this apartment last July.  Circumstance, experience, and, most of all, life has changed me.
Here's a brief recap, a highlight reel, if you will, of the past year--in no particular order:

I joined a book club.  If you know me at all, you know how pumped this made me.  Currently we're reading 11/22/63, which is so completely off-the-chain-and-totally-worth-every-one-of-its-eight-hundred-plus-pages.

My mom was diagnosed with cancer, had a hysterectomy and began taking chemotheraphy.  She is doing remarkably well after 3 treatments (halfway... 3 more to go!), and she will start radiation treatment later this month, hopefully.

I survived my first year of work and fell in love with my kids in the process.  I'm not by any means saying that every day was a picnic, but I really do love my job and feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be.

I have made my apartment, my own little space in this big world, mine, and I truly love coming here at the end of the day.  My personality and who I am echoes throughout these rooms, and, as cheesy as it may sound, this place makes me happy! 

I saw 6 fabulous Broadway shows at the Orpheum.  This is probably my favorite thing about living in greater Memphis and, if I'm wholly honest, one of the reasons I searched hard for a job here.  The Orpheum consistently has the best Broadway lineup outside of Times Square, if you ask me, and I always look so forward to seeing productions there.  Over the past year I saw these gems:

I bought a new (to me) car.  The purchase was long overdue, really, but a huuuuuge commitment.  I'm so excited to have a new ride, though, and it's a good thing because I'll be making payments into my thirties.  (I almost threw up when I typed that, for several reasons.)

Most recently, I officially launched my calligraphy sideline business.  You haven't heard about it?  Well, by all means, please check it out here, and feel free to refer me to any and all of your friends/family/loved ones (shameless plug).  I'm really excited about it!

I am incredibly excited and hopeful as I look forward toward what's to come in the next 365 days.  There's no way to know what God has in store for me during the coming twelve months, but I am excited about the possibilities, opportunities and experiences that I know lie ahead of me.

Busy Daze

These past few weeks have been jam-packed for me, and I'm really thankful for that because it's made time fly and kept my mind from worrying (y'all know I'm prone to do that!).  Between coordinating state testing, totalling scholarships, presenting at Awards Night, speaking at Freshman Orientation, attending Senior Breakfast, finalizing senior records, corralling hyped-up seniors at graduation, and finalizing underclassmen cumulative transcripts (not to mention all the crises that have popped up in between), work has made this guidance counselor a total lunatic.  I am so proud of my seniors, though, and was on such a high last night after their graduation.  I can't believe I've almost completed my first full year in a job I fought so hard to get, and I'm so looking forward to the excitement next year holds.  I miss my first senior class already (how did I get so attached to them in just one year??), but I'm thrilled to say I've already signed my contract for next year (hooray!), and I know there are wonderful things in store there, as well.
I've continued to go home every weekend (this will be my 14th straight weekend in Columbus) to be with mom as she prepares for chemo, which actually starts tomorrow.  She saw her gynocological oncologist on May 7, and he felt she was healed enough to begin this preventive treatment as soon as all the preliminary visits, tests, etc. were done.  Visits to the chemo oncologist and the radiologist have kept her busy these past two weeks, and she's also had a port implanted (where she'll receive her chemo meds), had a CT scan, and undergone several blood tests to make sure her body is ready to begin treatment.  She's even been fitted for a stylin' wig and has it ready and waiting if she needs it days or even weeks down the road.  Tomorrow is the big day, and I would be lying if I said she wasn't anxious and fearful.  She is wholly ready to "get this show on the road," but, as is almost always true with the unknown, she gets anxious about possible side-effects and reactions to treatment.
You have all been so amazing throughout these last four months of our lives, and I thank you in advance for continuing to stand beside us and lift us up.  Those of you who have called, visited, brought food, sent her a card, etc. have really warmed her heart and mine, and we will never be able to thank you enough for your love and support.  I ask you to keep a few specific prayers in mind tomorrow as she undergoes the first treatment:
Pray she will have peace and calm before and during the treatment
Pray her body will be able to receive the medication with little to no side effects
Pray if there is one tiny cancer cell in her body, this powerful medicine will obliterate it
Also, I selfishly ask for a prayer for myself, as well.  I can't be with my mom during her treatment, which, if you know us at all, you know is incredibly difficult for me.  I can't be away from work and won't be able to be home until Friday, so please, if you have a spare second, pray for my nerves to be calmed and my anxious thoughts to be put to rest, as well.  She won't be alone during or after the treatment, but y'all know what a control freak I am... I want to be there with her through every tough situation, but that's just not always possible.  (I think it's very possible God is working really hard in me to surrender some of that need to control everything...)  You, my friends, are so dear to us, and we are so thankful for every one of you.  God has carried us through this season of our lives, but you have made us laugh and cry and put smiles on our faces throughout it all. 
You'll never know how much you mean--

Shower of Love

Before I update you on Mom's status, let me say a special wow and thank you.  I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of love so many of you have shown me since I posted about Mom's diagnosis last week.  Your texts, calls, emails, Facebook messages, etc. have covered me in love and support like a warm blanket, and so many of them have arrived at the exact minute I needed them most.  You are all very special to me, and please believe my sincerity when I say I am so thankful for each of you!

But now back to the news...
We did receive Mom's pathology report late last week.  First the positive:  the cancer was contained to her uterus, and her doctor was able to fully remove the cancer present.  Hallelujah, God is so good!  The news that was a little harder to swallow came in the form of his recommendation that she take 6 rounds of chemotherapy as well as some radiation.  This is strictly precautionary, and, as of now, Mom is planning to follow his recommendation.  We trust her oncologist completely and have total faith in his skill, training, experience, etc.  She will go back and see him around the first of May and, if healed enough from the hysterectomy, start her first round of chemo almost immediately, with one treatment every 3 weeks.  Please pray that her body will be strong enough to get started at that time, as well as that she will be able to withstand chemo with minimal side effects.
Now, as I mentioned in my last post, Mom doesn't seem to do anything the easy way--at least when it comes to her medical procedures!  This weekend was another prime example of that to add to our list.  When I got home Friday night, I noticed Mom's right ankle and lower leg were swollen, red around the ankle and warm to the touch.  She said she hadn't hurt it or twisted it or anything, but we elevated it and iced it Friday night, anyway.  I told her if it looked the same Saturday morning, we were going to need to go to the hospital.  When we woke up Saturday, it looked a little less swollen but not enough to wholly ease my mind.  So, we trekked it down to the ER, where, after several hours and several tests, they ruled out a blood clot (which is what I had feared) and diagnosed her with cellulitis, or a bacterial infection.  We were beyond thankful she doesn't have a blood clot, but we prayed her antibiotic would go to work quickly and effectively to reduce the infection.  Her doctor wanted to see her back in his office today, and, as he told us in the ER Saturday, he was 'not going to hesitate to put her in the hospital to receive antibiotics by IV' if he wasn't satisfied with her improvement.  I came home this afternoon to go to the doctor with her, and I am blessed to be able to say that, before I could even get to the office, he had seen her and dismissed her, very pleased with her improvement.  I am so thankful that we're at home watching American Idol now and not at the hospital getting IV antibiotics!  Again, God is SO good!
Please continue to keep those wonderful prayers coming as Mom continues to heal and prepare for chemo and radiation.  We are clinging to our faith tighter than ever before right now, and we are beyond thankful for your continued love and support.  Please pray specifically for me, as well, as I try to focus on my end-of-the-year responsibilities at work.  I've got lots to do to close out the school year and get these sweet (and, yes, a few not-so-sweet) seniors graduated, and I need to be able to clear my head of cancer and focus on them a little.  Can I ask y'all one other favor?  If you think of Mom over the next few weeks or months, will you drop a card in the mail to her?  She's gotten wonderful cards and notes from so many special people, and they both cheer and inspire her, as well as continue to remind her of how many people love and pray for her.  She goes back and reads those words when she's having a hard day, so those special words lift her up again and again.  I know how much it would mean to her... and how much it would mean to me, too.
Thanks again to all of you for your constant thoughts and outpouring of love; keep lifting us up, dear friends!
All my love,

Clinging to the Cross

“What, then, shall we say in response to these things?  If God is for us, who can be against us?”—Romans 8:31
On this Easter Sunday, I am filled with the spirit of God more, perhaps, than any Easter Sunday before.  God has carried me through these past few days, weeks, and months, and, with His continued strength and reassurance, I hope to be able to withstand anything that comes.  Thusfar, 2012 has been a whirlwind, and my faith has often been the only thing keeping me grounded.
In case you’re lost and wondering just what I’m talking about, I’ll back up and start from the beginning.
On Martin Luther King, Jr. Day (January 16), my mom started having some irregular bleeding.  Having gone through menopause years earlier, this was immediately concerning, so she made an appointment with her local gynecologist.  She saw him on February 2, and he diagnosed her with fibroid tumors and said it was very possible the bleeding would stop on its own.  He wanted to see her back in 2 weeks to check the status of the bleeding and do a scrape of the lining of her uterus.  She returned to his office on February 16 for the scrape, but he was unable to get the sample he wanted.  So, he scheduled her for a D & C (Dilation and Curettage, a routine outpatient surgical procedure) on February 24, in order to obtain the needed sample of the lining of her uterus.  The procedure went smoothly, and we awaited her results.  Throughout all of this time, mom had no pain and the bleeding had ceased soon after her initial visit to her doctor.  We had speculated in our own minds that her doctor might recommend her having a hysterectomy over the summer.   On March 2, however, she went back to her doctor and received a diagnosis I had feared but not dared to speak:  endometrial (uterine) cancer.
Those two words hit me in the stomach with a one-two punch that took my breath away.  Cancer.  My brain could hardly process it.  The word just didn’t even feel right in my mouth—it tasted bad and begged to be spit out.  The world tilted a little in that instant, and it immediately became one of those before/after moments.   My life was one way before the diagnosis; my life is different now.
Her local gynecologist referred her on to a gynecological oncologist in Jackson, and an appointment was made with him for March 13.  Not only was that appointment made, actually, but she had an appointment the following day for surgery, as well—a total hysterectomy, including uterus, ovaries, lymph nodes and appendix, too.  (See why I feel like I’m in a whirlwind?)  So, on the morning of March 13, we traveled to Jackson and met with her oncologist.  As mom and I will both attest, walking into an oncologist’s office makes a cancer diagnosis awfully real.  Looking around the waiting room, I knew that everyone there was associated in some way with a cancerous diagnosis, and my heart broke for them just as I knew theirs broke for me.  Strangers upon entering, we all quickly realized we had more in common than we initially saw. 
We met with her doctor, whom we both instantly liked, and talked with him about the next day’s procedure as well as the possibilities for post-op treatment.  We left his office with detailed surgery-day instructions and spinning heads, but we were both eager to “get this show on the road.”  The surgery went well, and mom began her recovery.  Her doctor had hoped to be able to perform the surgery using the technologically-advanced da Vinci robot, but, because of the positioning of one of her ovaries, he had to do an incision.  That caused mom some additional discomfort as she began to heal from the operation, but we were, of course, in favor of him doing whatever he needed to do to get the cancer.  In addition, mom lost a good bit of blood during surgery (all of the nurses kept saying she had a “big surgery”), so, several days after her operation, she had to receive 2 units of blood.  We were released from the hospital on Monday, March 19, and headed home to Columbus (you can imagine how unpleasant that ride was).  After only being home a few days, I noticed that one of the incision spots looked a little infected, so I called her oncologist’s nurse practitioner to check it out with her.  She called mom in an antibiotic, which we started that day.  (It’s a running joke with mom and I (observed in her past surgical endeavors), that she can never do anything the easy way!!)  In the weeks since, she’s been resting and recovering and trying to regain a little bit of strength every day.  I’ve been coming home to help her every weekend, as she gets tired very easily.  I am, without a doubt, exhausted and practically dead on my feet much of the time, but I’m so thankful to be able to help her through this time and even more thankful for the strength God gives me to continue on. 
As it stands now, we await one final piece of the puzzle to know where her treatment will go from here.  We are still waiting on the pathology report from her surgery, as the lab has been backed up and her doctor wants to have time to thoroughly study the pre-op and post-op reports.  You can probably imagine how tortuous this waiting has been, but we cling to the knowledge that this too is part of God’s plan for both of our lives, and we know that, in perfect time, the next steps will be revealed.
I cannot thank you all enough for the calls, texts, emails, cards, visits, flowers, food, and, most of all, thoughts and prayers you’ve sent our way over the past weeks.  Your love and support has kept us going when things got too heavy, and we will never be able to express to you all how much it means.  I ask you to please continue to pray for us as we await the pathology report (which we hope to have Tuesday) and find out what, if any, will be the next step in mom’s treatment.  Seeing as the first symptom appeared not even 3 months ago, you can understand why our heads continue to spin when we really think about all that has come to pass so far this year.  We ask your prayers for strength, patience, thankfulness, and, perhaps most of all, trust in God’s perfect plan.  We fully believe that God is in control of all things, but worry and anxiety and discouragement inevitably try to creep in, and your kind words and fervent prayers help us fight those dark moments.  I will try to be more vigilant in updating the blog, but let me again say a huge THANK YOU for all you’ve done for us these past weeks!!
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."--Jeremiah 29:11
To God be the Glory,