The Latest Fashion

A few months ago, I wrote a post about fashion: the do's, the don't's, and the did she reallys?, according to me, of course. Now that spring has officially sprung, however, I felt led to add a few more observations, atrocities, and musings. I'll say now like I said then, these are merely my opinions, not meant to offend.
It's all in fun, people. All in fun.

Doo rags. I wasn't really aware that people still wore doo rags anymore, but I've spotted several lately. Unless particating in some sort of redneck event and also wearing jorts and a fanny pack, I feel the doo rag should be left at home. A baseball cap would do the same job with a lot more class.

The other day I swear I saw a lady walking to class wearing shorts overalls. I hadn't seen any of those since I was in junior high, and, seeing these, I was reminded of why.

Cardigans can be worn with almost anything--dresses, t-shirts, jeans, dress pants. They can truly go anywhere.

Am I the only one who thinks that certain fabrics should not be worn outside of certain seasons? For example, I would not wear linen to Christmas Eve church service, and I would ask that you not wear corduroy to the Fourth of July picnic.

I will forever be jealous of those girls who looked like they just stepped off the pages of an Urban Outfitters catalog. If I'm not shown exactly how to wear clothes from that store, I'm likely to wear a skirt as a hat or a sweater as a scarf.

I think velcro rollers are the best beauty invention I've happened upon in a long time, especially if, like mine, you're hair's volume is on mute.

Who is responsible for the production of those thick soled flip flops? You know the ones I'm talking about; you can buy them at Old Navy in a plethora of colors, all equally terrible.

Flat bill hats: I don't get it.

It's my opinion that, upon entering college, high school clothing (e.g. garments emblazoned with your high school's name/emblem/catchy slogan) should be discarded, or at least pushed to the back of your closet (or perhaps made into a quilt?). Cleaning house, washing the car, painting, sleeping--knock yourself out. Wear nothing but high school paraphernalia if you want. But keep it current when venturing out in public. Nothing screams "underclassman" like your high school track hoodie or that prom t-shirt you just can't let go.

I don't think capri pants do anything for anyone. Cropped pants: cute. Bermudas: like 'em. Capris, however, do not flatter anyone, no matter the age, height, weight, etc.

Facial hair, in my opinion, is case-sensitive, but one thing I will never get on board with is that little tuft of hair under the lower lip, commonly referred to as "the soul patch." Ew.

Big, huge earrings: I feel like that ship has sailed.

I'm not a huge proponent of track suits in general, but I feel that, for a guy, donning a tracksuit is like serving up your manhood on a platter.

One shoulder is back in full force, and I, for one, couldn't be happier about it.

You know what you rarely see these days? JNCO. You know what I'm talking about? Those gigantic skater jeans? I saw some this morning, and it reminded me of all the reasons you don't see them anymore.