Weekend Overdrive

If you didn't see me this weekend, consider yourself fortunate.  I had an amazing time, but I was nothing short of a one-lady hurricane.  I ran around barefoot all day in muck and mud until my feet looked like this:

I kept my cell phone permanently attached to my hand, making all kind of phone transactions I didn't need to make.  I thought paper towels were pieces of lettuce.  I had an agenda all my own, and I didn't seem to feel it necessary for anyone else to think it a good idea.  I laughed until I couldn't any more, and then I laughed some more.  I feel pretty certain that lots more happened that just hasn't resurfaced yet.

And Sunday, when I dared open my eyes, I wasn't sure I would ever be able to move my head again in my lifetime.

I think my game day guru summed it up best with this hysterically accurate text he sent me yesterday (seriously, I've laughed about it for two days, and I've told it to everyone):

"I feel like instead of riding the night route, I decided to let it drag me from downtown to the cotton district."

(PS:  Carl, what am I going to do without you if you leave me this weekend?  It's official:  you can't go anywhere.)

Football season 2009 is shaping up to be one for the record books.  I thought football season 2007 was the pinnacle, but this one is already blowing it out of the water.  My apartment will probably look a bomb went off there every weekend, but it is well worth it.  My friends are amazing, and I am so thankful for them (and, on top of everything else, they are absolutely hilarious).

I have a huge, huge midterm tomorrow that I most definitely need to be studying for, but I can't seem to make myself stop laughing and focus.  Apparently, I couldn't slow down long enough this weekend to take many pics, but I'll leave you with a few.  Hope you all have a great week!

Birthday

Welcome to the world, Frances Rose!

I am so excited to welcome this newest little bundle of joy to my family. 

Here she is with her proud papa, my cousin (and might-as-well-be-older-brother) David.  She arrived a little ahead of schedule, but we are so glad she's here safe and sound and that she and mom Leslie are both healthy and happy.

Don't y'all think birth is the most amazing thing?  I mean, yesterday Frances Rose was just an abstract concept, nearly impossible to visualize and almost wholly unknown, and here she is, today, a living, breathing miracle and a concrete example of God's infinite power.  She's a tiny little person, and I can't wait to meet her, watch her personality develop, and learn all about the person she will become.

I guess her birth comes at a time when I am hypersensitive to babies and the miracle of human life.  Right now it seems all I study in my classes is  the developmental process, and we talk so much about everything that can go wrong; I almost forget how right everything can go, too.  That seems pretty silly, though (and just downright insulting to God), when you see a tiny little slice of perfection like her.

Can't wait to meet you, Frances Rose; I'm so glad you're here. 

It's Time

Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels.

This I know to be true. I've been on the diet coaster since practically before I wore a training bra, and I'll probably be on a diet in the nursing home. You name it, I've probably tried it cheated on it. I've known the high highs of successful weightloss, and I've also, at times, contemplated smashing every mirror and reflective surface with which I come into contact.

I know by heart the variables that form the perfect equation for shifting the scale, and I'm also an expert at blowing a diet in record time. I have the workout videos, the workout clothing, and the gym membership, but I also have the ability to make every excuse in the book and make everything else a priority. You know I can't possibly forfeit one mindless vital television show, but I sure can't ever quite find enough time to squeeze in a workout.

I know what my problem is. I adore am obsessed with love food. I like the idea of food (cooking, etc.), and I love the social aspect of food. I like to eat food; I like to talk about food. Food, however, doesn't care much for me, or maybe it likes me too much? Perhaps a love/hate thing or something...

The spiral is usually about the same. I'm going strong for a few hours, a day, several days, maybe even a week. Then I start to think about food and all the food I'm not "allowed" to have, and it's like a magnetic force. The theme song from Jaws starts to play in my mind, and it's like a ticking time bomb. It's only a matter of time before I'm eating every cookie on the planet and drinking every Dr. Pepper I've ever seen.

So, why am I telling you all this? Why, few close friends and various assorted strangers, am I spilling my guts about this lifelong struggle? (That just made me think about that show on Nickelodeon, Guts. Do y'all remember that show?) Anyway, the reason I'm opening my mouth heart and spewing all my info out all over the place is this: insanity accountability. Maybe knowing I've told all to all of you and knowing you're sitting in judgment observation of me will serve as a constant reminder of what I'm trying to do.

I've decided I need someone to be accountable to, and, condolescences congratulations (!), I've picked you. You have permission to slap my hand, remind me of my commitment, and use cliches on me. ("I'm doing this because I love you.") I would love your help; I will cherish your encouragement; and I need your prayers, for I know I'm really needing to do this:

and I promise I'm going to try. (Don't think you're never going to see me eat a pizza again. Let's be real here.) I'm off to a relatively good, though slow, start; I've lost 15 lbs since March... which is better than nothing, right?

So, anyway, your responsibility ends here. Just being there to listen is all the pressure support I need. I solemnly swear that this blog will not turn into some sort of weightloss diary sob story.

Ugh... what a snooze (for both of us).

For now I'm feeling strong and my iron will is firmly in place, but I know there will be days I come home feeling like this:

and will want to eat all of this:

For those days, I ask for your prayers, forgiveness, and listening ears in advance.

I'll keep you updated on this portion of my saga continuing journey. This is not really about a crash diet or dieting for a specific event; it's more about a lifestyle change, and, let's be honest, it's just something I need to do. Even more than that, I want to.

All tips, recipes, ideas, bullying, encouragement, and prayers are welcomed, appreciated, and wanted. Like Screech said to Zack (I think), "I want to pump [clap] you up."

Oh, and if any of the three two people I know who live in Starkville want to work out, I'm totally game. (I mean, the embarrassment would be minimal for you because clearly I'm a senior citizen. Maybe you could even get community service hours or something?)

So, jump on board. It's going to be terrible fun terribly fun.

Oh, and did I mention I am starving right now?! (All this talk of food, perhaps... or the pictures of food...)
Off to a miserable fabulous start, huh?

Welcome to My Nightmare

I had the most bizarro/morbid/macabre dream nightmare last night.  Well, it was actually early, early this morning, but that's really beside the point.  It is so vivid in my mind, yet so completely surreal.
It was really a twisted version of my worst nightmare, but there were elements of truth and good things in it, too.  I don't know how to say it; it was just weird.  Unsettling, really.
So, enough blabbering already.  I'll tell you all about it.
It took place in the present day, but pretty much everyone I had ever met was in it.  (I didn't literally see everyone I had ever met, but there were people I saw from every phase of my life, so, potentially, everyone I've ever met could have been there.)  Anyway, my mom had apparently died when I was young, and I had been raised by my father for most of my life.  From what I could gather, my dream nightmare life had apparently gone very similarly to my actual life, except that the parental roles were reversed.  In the dream freaky hallucination, however, my dad had just died, and my family was in turmoil.
So, let's recap:  mom dies when young; dad dies when twentysomething; life turned upside down.  Not so freaky, right?  Wrong.
So, as the story continues, all these dirty little secrets start to come out about my dad.  He's been gambling away every cent we had for years; everything we "own" is actually borrowed or on loan; he's in debt up to his eyeballs.  But, now that he's gone, his debts fall to me--the struggling student with her own pile of mounting debt.  
Crap.  Awesome.
So, because I can't pay that jerk's my dear old dad's mountain of bills, the government seizes everything from my house. Everything.  Every article of clothing, every dish, every memory of my mom, every piece of jewelry, every piece of furniture.  Everything.  Men in black suits came in and took my whole life away with them in a few haphazardly loaded trucks.
After this there's sort of a gap in the scenes, and it picks back up at this giant, hospital/gymnasium-like structure.  This is where all these people I know start to come into the story.  Everyone is milling around and whispering behind their hands, cutting glances at me like I'm too stupid to realize what they're doing.  I ran inside and finally saw what everyone was talking about.
All of my belongings, everything they'd taken from my house, was strewn about displayed in this giant room.  Floor to ceiling, row after row of my stuff.  Apparently the government was holding some sort of giant yardsale, and everything I'd ever owned was up for grabs (not to mention every object related to "family" I'd ever known).  People were openly laughing at me and our things; they were pointing and mercilessly mocking us me.
It was like my own personal version of Vertigo, and I wasn't sure where to turn or what to do.  I couldn't breathe.  This is one of the oddest parts, though (as if the whole thing isn't bizarre enough).  The only people who were being even remotely nice to me were my friends Carl and Adam.  Literally.  Everyone else I knew was being absolutely wretched. (I guess I should take this rather awkward opportunity to say 'Happy Birthday' to Carl.... er, Happy Birthday, Carl.)  Carl and Adam are great guys, so that part's not that odd, but they're just not really in my everyday life, so where did my brain pull them from?  What manifestation of insanity was this entire dream episode?  They say that nightmares reflect stresses experienced during the day, so what stressors brought out that acid trip unpleasant image?  And why were Adam and Carl the only two to show me any humanity?  Traitors Friends, do you have something to tell me?! 
Anyway, after the giant yardsale scene and the pondering of these big unfounded questions, I came out of my slumber, only to realize that I was supposed to leave for work in ten, count 'em... onetwothreefourfivesixseveneightnineten... ten minutes.
Crap.  Awesome.
So, this is now my day went.  I thought about this disturbing, eerily-real-but-obviously-not dream mindgame all day while refusing to look at myself in a mirror, for my day-old ponytail and yardwork-worthy ensemble were almost too much to bear.  
Not the best swell day.
Pretty trippy, huh?          

Thinking Cap

Just a little bit of what went through my head today, random though it may be...

If I ever had a peeping Tom, I bet it wouldn't take long for him to wish he'd gone elsewhere.

A song from the Hanson Christmas cd just shuffled through my iPod. I wish it was November.

Maybe if I just quit wearing summer clothes and force myself into jackets and long sleeves (sweating all the way), I can force the start of fall through sheer will.

Is the texture of my hair changing? What's up with all these waves and curls and flips?

If I ever rode a motorcycle, I feel 96.7% certain that it would end in a fatality (mine). I just don't think I'm built for that type of machine.

Riding a bike with a sucker in your mouth doesn't seem like the best idea, dude I just passed.

I wonder what it would be like to live in Seattle? I secretly think I would enjoy the constant rainy overcastness of it all.

After almost twenty-five years of life and twenty-one years of education (including a degree in English), I'm still not sure when to use whom as opposed to who.

I wish I had my camera to take pictures of those raindrops on those leaves.

Either I am walking abnormally fast, or everyone else is in zombie-mode and moving at snails' paces.

I am very pleased with my new casual-but-not-too-casual-to-be-sporty athletic shoes. Solid purchase.

I mercilessly mock on-campus PDA, but I know that, if some guy wanted to walk across the Drill Field holding my hand, I wouldn't hesitate to hold on tight.

My birthday is 3 months from today. I love my birthday. I wonder what day it's on? Oh... a Monday. Harumph...

This computer (my work computer) makes me want to kick someone's face in. What is it doing?!

If I spent half as much time on my school work as I did planning trips (e.g. Chicago), I would be... finished with my work a lot faster. (The same goes for thinking about my blog. Exhibit A: this post.)

There is an addictive ingredient in Hamburger Helper; I'm convinced of it.

Is there such a thing as quarter-life onset dyslexia?!

I will do almost anything to delay having to do my schoolwork.

I love that Becca wrote a blog about her breakfast.

I don't think my phone has made a peep in hours. No emails, no texts, no calls... oh, wait... my mom called. How could I forget?

Reading a chapter of my assigned reading entitled "Toileting" (use your imagination; it's that bad) might be an all-time low for me.

My left shoe is tied entirely too tight. Has it been that tight all day?

Blue eyeshadow is something I feel should be approached with extreme caution.

Go see Fame this weekend or The Informant...? This is a tough one.

I'm pretty sure that the brand new candle I just lit stinks. Did it smell like that in the store? I can't believe I would have bought something so fowl...

I wonder... if I followed more blogs, would more people follow mine?

Saturday In the Park

I have had some fabulous weekends the past several weeks, but I cannot even pretend that I wasn't super excited about having a totally free Saturday today. I didn't have anywhere to be; I wasn't going to do any school work (I've made a pact with myself... no weekend homework!), and I had a whole day of freedom ahead of me.

What to do... where to start?!

Well, those of you who know me well can probably guess where I started off my day.

After sleeping a little late this morning, I strolled right up the street to one of my favorite Starkville eateries, City Bagel Cafe. I had my favorite breakfast (spinach and cheddar bagel with eggs and cheddar cheese and a hot chocolate, for those of you who were interested), and read for hours. (Read for pleasure, might I add.) I'm almost embarrassed to admit that I read all the way through breakfast, early lunch, regular lunch and into the late lunch. What can I say, I was really into my book (s). (Yes, I finished one and started another... I'm a megadweeb, I know.)

Anyway, so seeing as I read right through lunch, I got a turkey sandwich to go, and headed off to my next destination. I have been itching to see (500) Days of Summer since I first saw the preview earlier in the summer, and I just knew it would never come to sleepy Starkville. Surprisingly, though, I was proven wrong, and it came last weekend. So, I made my way to the theater (turkey sandwich in towe, of course--sneaking City Bagel into the movies is one of my favorite things to do) and settled in for my movie. It was so, so good!! It was funny, sweet, sad, hopeful... so much all rolled into one. If you've seen it, I hope you'll agree; if not, I highly recommend it. Check out my movie blog for my full review of it; it's one of my better reviews I've written, if I do say so myself.

Anyway, after that, I headed out to take some pictures. I hadn't been able to take any pictures in a long time, and seeing Rachel's blog really made me want to go out and take some. So, I headed to Mississippi State's rose garden, a place where I have always wanted to go but for some reason have never visited. It was gorgeous, and I think I got some pretty neat pictures. It felt good to be out playing around again, anyway. (I put some more from this series on Facebook, if you want to see more.)

Finally, I'm sitting on my couch watching Mississippi State take on the Auburn Tigers, hoping we can pull out a victory. The first half was kind of a rollercoaster, and the second half has started of rather slowly; I'm still rooting for my Bulldogs and my favorite new head coach, Dan Mullen, though!

I hope everyone's had a great Saturday and you've been as laid back as I have. I've been beyond worthless, and it's been beyond fabulous.

Just Buy It

Okay, confession time.

I have been on a bit of spending spree for the last, say, 48 hours.

I think it all started earlier in the week when my teacher told me I had to buy this:

I know it may look like just a book, nonthreatening and uninteresting at that. However, this tome way worse than it looks. First of all, it's over 1000 pages long, and it weighs somewhere in the neighborhood of 15 lbs.

Seriously.

And I can't even bear to type what it cost, for my gag reflex kicks in just thinking about it. (As if I didn't already spend hundreds of dollars on books this semester...)

Oh, grad school, how I loathe you.

Anyway, so after adding this future doorstop to my cart, you know I wasn't going to leave the Barnes & Noble website without getting myself a little something. So, I bought a few more of these (because I have so much spare time for pleasure-reading, you know):

And just like that, it's like I just couldn't stop.

The next thing I fixated on was new boots, for fall is swiftly approaching, and I refuse to be caught unaware. So, after spending a whole day at work scouring the internet, I settled on these:

They are presently en route to my humble abode, and I'm ready and waiting for them.

Then, Zappos being the magnetic force that it is, I became entranced with these little beauties:

I wouldn't rest until they were on their way to my house, too!

Let me take this moment to give some major kudos to Zappos, for I ordered these last night about 6:30, and they arrived on my doorstep today at 12:00 o'clock on the nose. AND, they upgraded my shipping and my priority at no extra charge. Dear Zappos,
I loved you from the start, but in me you now have a neverendingly faithful customer. Forever.

All my love,

Spring.

Anyway, after my purchase from Zappos, I swore I was done. I was laying on my couch, leisurely flipping through InStyle (which, I have realized, is often my downfall), and I spotted Julia Roberts looking tres chic in these fabulous Ray Bans. Pulling up the website on my trusty laptop, I discovered they really weren't very expensive, and before I knew it I was getting a confirmation number and the order was complete.

These little beauties are on their way to my door as we speak:Let me clearly state that I by no means have the money to have bought any or all of these things. I am a poor, struggling student and live on a meager student's income. I eat Hamburger Helper and occasionally I even have to resort to Chef Boyardee. I live in an apartment barely big enough to turn around in, yet I just blew my entire pay check on these online purchases I "just couldn't pass up." I did get really good deals on everything, so that's definitely a plus, but I was like an unstoppable force. I had to have all of them. It was like if I didn't have them I would die; my life would be incomplete. How awful is that?!

And here's the clencher, I have not one ounce of buyer's remorse for anything I've bought (except for the stupid textbook that started this whole frenzy, of course). I love them all, and I can't wait for the rest to arrive!

I'll probably be eating Ramen noodles and SpaghettiOh's for God knows how long, but at least my feet will look good, and I'll be able to keep the sun out of my eyes.

Power In Me

Y'all know how goofy I get about the stuff I'm studying sometimes, but I saw something in class today that I just had to show y'all. This video might be the single most powerful instrument I've ever seen to demonstrate the powerful influence adults have on children.
It seems to me that, in many cases, kids today have the deck stacked against them from the start, and when their parents are not providing the appropriate guidance and positive examples they need, they are practically guaranteed to end up in a bad place.
Anyway, just check the video out if you're so inclined. I'm looking at a future in education, and even I forget sometimes how easily children are influenced. The images in this video gave me chills, and its impact will undoubtedly stay with me for a long time.
It's pretty powerful... but you don't have to take my word for it.

Weekend Warrior

What a crazy weekend.

And by crazy I totally mean so-much-fun-I'm-not-sure-where-to-start.

It all started Friday afternoon in the Junction (or, as we like to call it: The Crunktion), hanging out with some of my favorite newlyweds while we waited to set up the tailgate tent. We told ridiculous stories, laughed a lot (shocking, I know), and took it all in. Mississippi State was a totally awesome place to be on a gorgeous Friday afternoon in September.

After that, Becca came and picked me up, and we headed to Bin 612 (one of our favorite Starkville eateries) for a fabulous dinner with her dear ole dad. Mr. Steve kept us in stitches, and we bumped into several friends. It was shaping up to be a fabulous weekend, indeed.

After we had eaten all we could eat, and we couldn't eat anymore, we picked up Paige and headed downtown (after Becca almost killed us driving the .27 miles to the bar). Barrister's was a great time, and I had a few laughs talking to some friends I had been missing forever. We decided to call it a relatively early night (to be in top form for Saturday, of course), but not before stopping in at Old Venice for a minute and being immediately transported back to my true college days. That place was my home away from home for a pretty good chunk of time, and being there always takes me back.

Saturday morning dawned bright and beautiful as we prepped for a day of fun, friends, and football. I bumped into so many people and laughed until I could hardly stand up straight, and even a sudden mid-afternoon downpour wasn't enough to dampen the spirits on campus this weekend. Saturday night was spent downtown once again, swapping stories and laughing until I was hoarse.

I feel like I should probably take this opportunity to offer up a word or two of apology to anyone and everyone that I came into contact with over the weekend, for I'm pretty sure I was like a person with a weekend pass from the looney bin, and I think I was a bit of a handfull. I was laughing like a crazy person, snapping pictures with every person I've ever met, and goodness knows what else. The excitement definitely got to me, and for that reason I think I got a bit carried away...

Sorry...

That brings me to Sunday, during which, with the exception of a brief foray to Umi to fill up on sushi, Becca and I layed around my apartment until 5:30 in the afternoon. Never have I ever been a part of such utter worthlessness, but it was secretly wonderful.

Today was spent in Columbus with the mom, who I had fun catching up with and solving the world's problems. Unfortunately, I couldn't stay as long as I would have liked, for critiques, and textbooks, and group projects were beckoning me back far before I was ready.

I'll leave you with just a few of my favorite pics of the weekend (I'm telling you, I took mountains of pictures... I couldn't post all of them), and I hope everyone has enjoyed their holiday weekend!